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4 Funny Things About My Niagra Falls Hotel Room

1) Someone tried to have a Blue Valentine evening here and ended up punching a hole through the bathroom door. (If you don’t get the reference, watch the movie. Or don’t. It’s pretty intense.)
2) This trumpet with ribbon romantic “art”

3) There is a heart-shaped jacuzzi in the middle of the room. After hand washing this beast myself, I soaked my sore body in this baby and watched Jurassic Park. It was awesome. And funny.


4) The rest of the room was clearly designed by one of the Designing Women in 1985. Oh yeah black marble with mirrors.


All. Of. This.
Totally not worth the price, but, really, nothing in Niagra Falls Canada is.


Oh, Canada…. 7 Days and 300 Miles Trekking Across Southern Ontario

{Written August 22nd right outside Niagra Falls, ON. Published September 2nd in Ticonderoga, New York, with hotel WiFi.}

Oh, Canada….

Dustin and I have been riding slowly across southern Ontario for a few days now and here's what I think about Ontario in short form:

  • Canada is huge! Dustin and I are traveling along the southern most tip of Ontario basically following. Lake Erie from Port Lambton to the Lewiston-Queenston bridge outside Niagra Falls. I would love to come back another time and explore the northern icy portion of the province sometime.
  • The people are very nice. Exhibit A: We met a man on the ferry from Port Huron to Sabria and he invited us to his house for lunch and ended up letting us throw our mats down to sleep in his garage. Exhibit B: We stayed at the Fin and Feather trailer park in Booth's Harbour and a nice man gave us a couple litre bottles of much needed (and much appreciated!) soda. Exhibit C: We stayed at a trailer park on annual pig roast night (score, finally!) and we needed to bring a side to attend so one of the people who lived in said trailer park gave us two sides to contribute, just cause. Exhibit D: As we were leaving the world's third most expensive campsite ever a lady stopped us on the road asked if she could take our picture, told us she was proud of us and gave us $20 — just cause.

  • The produce is beautiful and abundant. We've been travelling mostly through fields of corn and other produce and, as a result, we've seen a lot of road-side stands selling beautiful heirloom tomatoes and other fresh fruits and vegetables. Most of the stands operate on the honor system; take a tomato (or a bag full) and leave your money in the provided vessel. I love that.
  • Lake Erie is beautiful (but sometimes it smells like a turned over outhouse). We've been riding along Lake Erie nearly the entire time we've been in Canada (~300 miles — or 492 kilometers as the Canucks say) and it's been really lovely. Lots of canadian geese (which Dustin pointed out, are just normal geese here), lots of beautiful panoramic views — and also….. lots of poo smell. (Why does Lake Erie smell like poo, Canada? Is it the algae? The goose poo? The steel plant? Inquiring minds need to know!)
  • There are a lot of wind turbines. For real; they're everywhere! And those suckers are HUGE when you really get close to them.

  • People are torn as to whether or not they like/support/hate the wind turbines. Nearly every yard has a sign supporting or opposing the wind turbines. I tend to agree with the “wind turbines = green energy” perspective, but apparently there is some controversy about whether the turbines will give the people who live below them cancer which causes some pushback. Sounds like propaganda to me… (Do you know anything about this?)
  • Everything costs way more in Canada than in the states. For no particularly good reason. Seriously, what the heck, Canada? Why does it cost $34 to stay the night in your “conservation area” that, based on the permanent-housing trailers and litter, more closely resembles a trailer park? $2.50 for a soda?? What the heck, Canada. $46 to pitch a tent 20 miles outside Niagra?? Psh. Outrageous.
  • Along with “eh,” the people also say “yous” here. e.g: “Are yous going to camp here?” “Do yous need anything?” This is not a complaint, just an observation. I like it.
  • There are some nice bike trails in Canada including the Waterfront Trail, which we rode along much of Lake Erie, and the Friendship Trail which we road for a while toward the Niagra Parkway Trail.

Tomorrow we're headed into Niagra Falls and quite frankly….. I'm scared. Or, more appropriately, my pocket book is scared. I see $6 sodas in my future and hotel rooms that had better include dinner and a movie built into the price…. The plan is to get in, see the Maid of the Mist, take 47 pictures of the falls, sleep in a real bed, and get the heck out of dodge. Wish us luck. I'll let you know how it goes. 🙂

Some Ontario Pictures For Your Viewing Pleasure:



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